Two of the Least Suspenseful Exits in the history of The Bachelor (The Bachelor Episode 7 Recap)



My real life responsibilities have once again interfered with my fantasy life blogging.  Based on that fact, and on this week’s episode being another trip to Snoozeville, I’ll be doing an abbreviated version of this weeks recap of The Bachelor.  This week marked the final dates before the hometown dates, but Juan Pablo must have been confused because he brought the women to his hometown of Miami a couple of weeks early.  In a move that really shouldn’t have surprised anyone, since she has been considering it essentially since day one, Sharleen decided that she and Juan Pablo just didn’t have the intellectual connection that she needed.  Sharleen was given the first one-on-one date this week, and hoped that she would finally find the deeper connection she had been looking for all season, but the date turned into one make out session after another, and Sharleen decided she would stop wasting everyone’s time and pack her bags.  I’ll miss Sharleen, it was nice to finally have a woman on one of these shows who wasn’t head over heels in love before she even met the bachelor in person.  Sharleen is one of the few people in the history of this series to realize that the whole process is kind of weird and not really a good way to meet your soul mate.  (Of course Sharleen also agreed to come on the show to begin with, so I’m not giving her too much credit).

The other lady headed home just shy of hometown dates was Chelsie.  Chelsie seemed like a funny perky girl who might be fun to hang out with, but after a while her act got pretty old, both for me and seemingly for Juan Pablo.  Maybe if Chelsie had been more willing to “dive headlong into love” during her one-on-one date with Juany Pabs things would have turned out differently, sadly for her we’ll never know.  Chelsie and Juan Pablo never built a real connection, and it’s felt like she could be headed home anytime now for weeks.

So now we know who went home this week, rather than do a full recap I’m just going to share a couple of thoughts I had while watching the rest of last nights episode.

-Why is Juan Pablo bringing Nikki to meet his family already?  He’s skipping steps damn it! And doesn’t meeting a bunch of women who are all dating her father at the same time seem more potentially harmful to Camila than seeing him making out with one of them in the ocean?


-Nikki thought visiting Juan Pablo’s “office” aka Marlins Park when it was empty was a really special treat, little does she know that this was basically the same number of people who are in the stadium when the Marlins are playing.

-Juan Pablo handled Sharleen telling him that she was leaving really well (he even wiped her snot with his finger), kind of makes me think he’s actually known this whole time that they weren’t really right for each other.

-Clare’s ghost dad is  going to be arriving in video form next week to make sure Juan Pablo is good enough for his daughter.  (Good thing he wasn’t still around for the slut shaming in Vietnam.  That episode could make for some awkward viewing if Clare and Juan Pablo do end up together in the end).

-The fight between Nikki and Clare set a new worlds record for the most times the word sh*t has been bleeped out on a reality show.  (That might not be true but if either of them said sh*t one more time I was going to reach through the TV and punch them in the f*cking face).

-Even though she is probably my favorite out of the remaining girls, I’m willing to admit Nikki can be a little bitchy at times.  I might even feel a little bit bad for Clare when they get into arguments if Clare wasn’t the most annoying person in the world.

-Isn’t it awkward to talk to the other women about the great connection you have with Juan Pablo, you remember they are dating the same guy right? (I’m looking at your Nikki).

That’s all I’ve got for this week.  Next week they are rolling out a two-day bachelor extravaganza covering hometown dates and the trips to the fantasy suite.  The preview shows both Andi and Clare’s parents refusing to give their blessing (but this always happens, and I’d say it’s not nearly as dramatic as they are trying to make it seem).  The real highlight of next week based on the preview for me is something going “horribly wrong” in the fantasy suite.  I’m not sure what could really go that badly in the fantasy suite, but I do know that I’m looking forward to next week’s shows more than I have been in a long time.  I’ll see you Thursday for a recap of the return of The Real World Ex-plosion, and next Tuesday AND Wednesday for a recap of all The Bachelor action, see you then.

Thoughts/Questions/Comments – You can reach me via email – or on Twitter – @NoOneGoesToClev


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